


Dear future husband

by Chemical_Syrups



Category: Sherlock (TV)
Genre: Crack, Fluff and Angst, I'm Bad At Tagging, Kinda, M/M, Murder Husbands, Songfic, i dont know it has, lyrics
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-04
Updated: 2019-10-04
Packaged: 2020-11-23 12:35:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,128
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20892212
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Chemical_Syrups/pseuds/Chemical_Syrups
Summary: A few scenarios from the murder husbands lives  +  lyrics from dear future husband





	Dear future husband

**Author's Note:**

> I was humming along to this catchy song while writing this lol.

**l. Take me on a date, I deserve a break**

Sebastian swallowed as he watched the consulting criminal, his boss, and boyf- no, fuck buddy, enter the flat through the front door. The last few weeks have been very busy, with all that Sherlock stuff going around, Jim's been working non-stop. From more aggressive behavior to his dark purple bags under each of those dark, bottomless pits, he certainly deserved a needed break. 

The sniper stood up from the couch and approached the Irishman slowly; the man did not like sudden movement. He lead the man to the dining table which has been set up and took out a bottle of wine from the kitchenette. Sebastian could feel Jim's piercing eyes on the back of his head and sighed.

"We're just having dinner, love. You've been up twenty-four seven for that Holmes bloke, just take a damn break."

Jim raised his manicured eyebrow. " Are you implying that this is a date?"

Sebastian turned back to Jim with two plates of pasta and tomato sauce. "It could be if you want it to be one."

"How sentimental of you." Jim huffed and turn away from Sebastian. His slightly reddened cheeks brought a smile to the snipers's face.

They proceeded to have dinner.

**ll. I never learnt to cook. But I can write a hook.**

Jim is _shit_ at cooking.

Napoleon of crime, the world's only consulting criminal, the Devil himself, cannot cook.

Looking at the pan of eggs that were currently cooking, Jim glared at them and whispered," I'll burn you, I'll burn the heart out of you." Sebastian was currently in France trying to earn the trust of some bloody banker so that he could blow his brains out so Jim had to cook for himself.

Jim pranced around the kitchen as he sing-song voice said ," I'll burnnnnn youuuu! Yes I will, I'll burn the heart out of youuuu," That night at the pool where he said that to Sherlock must have left the consulting detective wondering what the hell that really meant. It was simple, really, Jim just wanted to destroy his life. Bit by bit. The game that the both of them were playing at was dangerous, but that means the thrill of the game, and no boredom! That was something Jim was unable to resist.

As the criminal hummed to the Bee Gees and thought about ways to rip Sherlock Holmes apart, smoke came from the stove. Once Jim smelled it, he cursed in English and Gaelic and ran to the stove. He coughed and fanned the smoke away from his face.

When he took a peek at the underside of the egg, it was as black as coal. 

**lll. Tell me everything's alright**

Sebastian knew something was very wrong. 

The flat was eerily quiet. No Jim shouting his name, no television on. He unlaced his boots, put them by the door, dumped his rifle on the couch and proeeded towards the bedroom. "Jim?" He said, worry laced in his voice. The sniper slid into the bedroom only to find a lump of Jim-shaped blankets on the bed. There were sleeping pills all over the rug by the bed and silence, just too much silence. "Jim!" Sebastian shouted as he snatched the blankets from an alarmingly weak Jim. The consulting criminal was on the edge of unconsciousness and his eyes were blood shot.

The sniper finally got all the blankets away from the dark-haired man and carried him to the bathroom. "Christ, how many did you take?" He asked as he set Jim right in front if the toilet bowl. "L-lost count...Seb, it hurts...It wouldn't stop, the nightmares..."Jm croaked out. Sebastian got a toothbrush and shoved it down Jim's throat. That was hard, considering how much practice he had with deep-throating. Finally, Jim started gagging and threw up the contents of his stomach into the toilet. Seb kneeled by him and stroked his back and arms soothingly.

After brushing Jim's teeth, Sebastian carried Jim back to bed and tucked all the blankets around the both of them. "Seb..." Jim was whimpering and Seb couldn't help but run his hand through the dark hair and kiss all over his face. "Shhh, I've got you kitten. Everything's fine, I'm here to protect you..." Sebastian cooed as Jim started to relax.

Cuddling, they both fell asleep, wrapped in blankets and each other's arms.

**lV. After every fight, just apologise**

Sherlock this, Sherlock that. Sebastian was sick of that. Jim's obsession over the detective was getting out of hand. He's been barely eating or sleeping because he's got to _play the game _, he would say, in that stupidly charming Irish lilt.

The sniper had stormed out of the flat after fighting with the consulting criminal over his obsession with Holmes. All Sebastian got was a few but _he's so special, I've got to beat him in that game, _and_ you all are dull! _ Walking aimlessly along the streets of London, Sebastian thought that maybe he was too harsh towards Jim. He turned around and speed-walked home.

Flinging open the door, Sebastian saw that Jim was in the same place that he was in even after he left. He walked towards the Irishman, head bowed down and said,"'M sorry for that, I guess I'm just overreacting."

Jim stared at him with those dark, dark eyes. "Kneel." He said.

**V. Make time for me**

Sebbbbbbbb- JM

Don't leave me on read! Hey! -JM

Boss I'm running the damn errand you sent me to do, stop bugging me. -SM

I don't care, just take whatever suits you have now and return to the flat. At once.-JM

Too bad, I still need to complete this job.-SM

C'mom Sebby, pleaseeeee. For me?-JM

*picture sent* I'm sure you're not strong enough to resist my puppy dog eyes-JM

...I'll be back in 10 minutes-SM

Jim smiled to himself as he waited for Seb's return.

**Vl. Buy me a ring. Buy-buy me a ring, babe**

Sebastian gawked at the ring through the glass of the jewelry store.

The ring had a skull which was diamond encrusted with ruby for eyes. On the sides were patterns with skulls on them. It was the perfect mori ring for Jim.

As he snapped out of his little trace, he found himself walking into the shop and asking for the ring. With the money he had saved up from Jim's generous salary for Seb, the ring was now his. It was in a little black velvet box and fit snugly into his pocket. The lady behind the glass counter smiled and told Seb to get the lucky girl. Sebastian smiled, she clearly had no idea.

Later that night, through tears, Jim had said yes.

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you enjoyed that! Comments and kudos will be greatly appreciated!


End file.
